Monday, January 23, 2012

Fantasy Dinner Party

There's a special circle of hell reserved for adults with their own food allergies who do not support our children.

One of the worst cases of this in my own life was my son's jr. high principal. By the middle of 7th grade, my husband and I were fed up with all the places food was showing up in the supposedly "mostly food free" school, so we requested a conversation with the principal. Her response: "I know exactly how your son feels because I, too, have an allergy." To what, you ask?

Kiwi.

Really. She was equating avoiding kiwi with avoiding milk, soy and peanuts. When we pointed out to her that our son was habitually excluded from school activities because virtually all the foods used contained milk, she shrugged and said the equivalent of "it will toughen him up for 'real life.'"

Which brings me to my fantasy: the end-of-year teacher banquet. Know what's on the menu?
  • Fruit soup
  • Kiwi and peppers sweet and sour chicken
  • Summer lettuce salad (pre-dressed, of course, with a light, fruity, tropical dressing)
  • Tropical fruitcake
  • Kiwi lime pie
Doesn't it sound lovely? Oh, I'm sorry, what's that you said, Ms. Principal? You can't eat any of this food? Wow, that's a shame. However, I did save out this pack of PRETZELS for you. You can munch on it while you watch all your colleagues dig in.